So my life has been quite manageable so far in terms of studies n stuffs.but still im juggling to manage my time wisely here.

But one thing that is running in my head n my mind is about 'hati dan perasaan'

I actually hate that part cause its kind of tearing me inside.i dont think I should feel that way pun tapi entah,it still bothers.

Kadang I feel stupid for spending my time with him.what if he's not 'the one'??(well I dont even think he's the one pun sebab I dont think he feels the same too) tapi I dont know how to avoid.he keeps coming.

Told you I hate this kind of feeling!urgh sick you know, sick!!

Of palestine and peace.

It has been about two months since I last blogged.well, I just installed this app on my phone that I can blog on the go,so hopefully i'll blog more after this.
Life has been good but of course with some ups n downs which I should not complain more.

While i'm here complaining abt how piles of homeworks could ruin my life, how I dont have time to fold my machine-washed clothes, how lazy I am to go down n buy myself lunch, how I hate being g degree student, how hard I live here without a car to move around, and many other silly and absurd whining about my life rite now-there are other kids on the other side of the world who are fighting for their lives,without having sophisticated weapons to defend themselves against the zionist laknatullah!

Humanity is on the rock!

Killing those innocence kids,slaughtering n burning them to death with no mercy..what are those people thinking??defending themselves?from what??to me,they are nothing but coward.

I should be thankful enough for what I have now.ALHAMDULILLAH.

so muslims,let us pray.pray with all our heart, that the Allah will safe our brothers n sisters out there.thats the least we can do but in shaa Allah could make a huge difference.amin!

shah alam

It has been about two weeks since i set my butt here in Shah Alam. Yes, i got to continue my Degree here. Alhamdulillah I can cope here but obviously Arau served me better than here. I seriously miss my times in Arau. They say Shah Alam has everything but to me, here is plain, dull and hectic. Everyone is like a robot. Too engaged with own responsibilities. The dean of my faculty for me is kind of freaky and illogical. He decided the attendance to be 100% which means we have to attend each and every class without FAIL! That's why I say people here is like a robot that always work 24/7.

Well, I could not say much on that matter or else I'll be bailed. There is no students' voice here. Just because he holds the tittle DEAN OF CIVIL ENGINEERING FACULTY, everyone working under him is afraid of voicing out. I dont think that is rational and obviously it is not FAIR. Okay enough about that, please.

Oh, about my roommates, Alhamdulillah they are all awesome way beyond words. Thank Allah for that, or else I'll be more homesick because I take time to blend well with strangers.

Err,talking about degree, it is seriously hectic here. Everything is super fast and i have to work more on my own. Finding extra informations on the courses I take this semester, the tutorials, the pace that I have to be in line with, those are everything that is totally different from I came from previously. I MISS ARAU so freaking bad. I miss my buddies too. Shafiqah and Afifah. It feels different without them around. But Alhamdulillah we have phones nowadays, the only thing that keeps me in touch with them. Well, I could not complaint more. That is what life is afterall.

so i've been spending my time wisely these past few weeks..finally lah kan,after 2 months of break doing nothing,now at least i've done something productive!yeay me..so my busy days start of when i went to kl,er sri kembangan actually, to bring my grandma there as she wanted to visit her grandson having a new baby..so i brought my grandma there sbb dh takda org nk bwk dia,takkan nk let her travel alone pulak kan..so being a nice me,cewah,i tak jd pergi kerja nelson tu..konon2 berkorban sbb nk bwk tok p jumpak cicit kan..so i went there for 9 days..4 days spent dkt rumah my cousin tolong babysit my nephew n niece..now i miss them already awwww ;( kalau holiday ni makan mmg agenda utama lah kan?so now duduk rumah diam2 diet senyap2..haha..so heres some pictures yg sempat snap during my visit..

burger bakar taman equine..like omg,sedap gilaa!

nasi putih asam pedas-chawan,publika.

baby heidi is sooooo adowable suka senyum jaaa!!

adam mikhael being so proud of his 2 lamborghinies.

these 2 rascals were sooooooo freaking active walopon demam..i miss them now!mikha dh potong rambut afro dia..sayang betul!he said he wants to look handsome like daddy so he has to cut his hair short.

this is seriously a whine..yes im whining here..bukan apa,tp mcm terasa laa jugak over something..i feel like aku yg tersua-sua kalut suruh org p sana p sani..tp i dont know org tu suka ke tak diarahkan ke sana ke sini..tp kalau dh smua jenis buat tak tau ja,so siapa nk menggerakkan kan?so i played my part,contacting everybody to arrange for a meeting sbb kan dh lama tak jmpk catching up n such..n ada jgk org tu ckp dh lama tak jmpk si polan,nk jmpk si polan ni..n i did play my part to gather everyone kan..not once not twice,dh banyak kali ok!!so bila dh jd mcm ni, aku dh malas laa nk arrange apa2 pon lepas ni..n about the backpacking trip tu pon im not gonna take my part dah..dh penat hoping for something that is not gonna happen..xpa,ada rezeki nnt aku backpack lain even without you guys pon kan..xpa laa jgk even mimpi tak jd kenyataan pon drpd rasa down mcmni..its okay..thers always next time,tp im not ever gonna lead that 'next time'..find me when u guys have done discussing..im tired of being org tengah..like seriously!

tadi p pacific dgn mak saja jalan2 mak nk beli tudung..lepas tu p beli air dekat nelsons tu then nmpak ada iklan jawatan kosong..saja laa ringankan mulut tanya kak tu nk pakai org bila?then trus dia ckp,adik mai esok laa..boleh??amboi kak ni,tak menyempat betul..HAHA..terkejut aku tiba2 nk kena p keja esok kan..then aku pon ckp laa kat kak tu,esok tak boleh,15 ni boleh laa..haa then trus kak tu ckp ok,mai keja pkul 1..

haa cmtu jaa aku dpt keja..haha..alhamdulillah laa..yg lawaknya,gaji pon aku tak tanya berapa..nasib laa,jnji aku tak boring duduk rumah..kalau boleh insyaAllah nk keja 2 bulan smpai tgh bulan 8 ni which means before raya..lepas tu nk p jalan2 backpack with friends..insyaAllah,moga2 Allah permudah segala..amin ya rob!

my life has turned up side down for the past few days.my mind is not really at the state of normal..the thought of him keeps bothering my nights..i dont know why but i keep relating things i do or things i saw with him..everything i see through my days are always related to him or things i've done with him..i feel like knocking my head on the wall so that the thought is gone, but i know it never will.what has gotten into me,really? i dont like this kind of things..i can even relate random cars i saw on the road with him.oi,this is bullshit!i hope this weird feelings will fade soon. yes, the sooner the better.im tired of thinking about him to my sleep..