When im all alone and have plenty of time to think of anything,the feeling of total obnoxious of my own self strikes.i will look down on myself.inferiority complex strikes.i am totally not confident of my own self.i have a roomate who sings very very well and dance well too.me?dont u ever ask!i am tone deaf.i dont sing well and u’ll wish for a thunderstorm rather than listening me sing.dance?thats another thing i am very bad at.real bad i tell you!despite i cant sing,i dont play any musical instrument too.i cant barely strum a guitar or play the piano.what else with the wind instruments and everything.
Second is i always have issues with my hair.for as long as i lived,i sometimes dont like my hair.well not sometimes,you can consider it as ALWAYS.FYI,i constantly changed my hairstyle until i decided to stop when i enter university.i dont have those silky straight hair and trust me,my hair is a disaster.i always envy those with straight and silky hair that shines under the sun.at some point,i do think of chopping off my hair and be bald.
Talking of physical attraction,kick me out first baby because i am on top from the bottom of the list!i dont have those mesmerising eyes or perfectly cute nose.all i have is pimples all over my face.i wear specks since i am in primary school and u know how fugly i was that time.i am all jealous with my friends with the perfect body all ladies want in their life.i’ve never been skinny all my life.tell me i crazy or what but sometimes i do feel like never wanna go out of the room when inferiority is on the peak.
Ok shut the fuck up with the physical attraction thingy.lets talk about education.well im thankfull enough of my upbringing where education is being the most prior thing in life.but i am not a brainy one compared to my friends.and now i feel like im dragging myself to succeed in the field i am taking.i just occupy the basics one.not more than that.i dont get along well with numbers and figures and my brain cant accept too much facts.i dont perform well in my tests or exams.i dont master every subject.im just average in my studies and i WISH i do more beyond average.i want to be excellent.
Tell me in what aspect that i am unique?i dont think i am unique.i cant see my specialty.i cant stretch myself to be perfect,at least for myself to see that i am perfect.i cant get everything that i want like those filthy rich kids get.i dont have awesome gadgets or awesome clothes.i was nothing more than ordinary.i AM nothing more than ordinary.
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