there are things rolling hard in my mind..sometimes it feels like i am not being my true self whenever i am around him..i tend to please him in every way possible which i think i should not..i am not living to his expectation and not to anyone else's too..there are just 'things' running through me,leaving myself to figure things out of how to get rid of it..sometimes i feel it is more convenient for me to rant things to total strangers who appear in my life once and probably never will meet again..i feel more reserved as i am quite sure that the chances for them to dig things out again is very very ultra-thin..

i try not to tell personal things to my circles but i usually failed.i wanted so much to be more reserved and modest for not telling people what i feel..but anyway, theres just this one person i can spill out every single thing about how i feel on certain things especially this love-struck thingy..i somehow dont like how i feel right now..i guess the respect that i put on him grew to like and the like grew to errr, LOVE? ah, i dont know myself either.

i turned out liking him more than i originally planned.